The Culture of Lying, Diogenes, JA Barnes, Bell Hooks
Have you developed a sense of insecurity because of a flirtatious boyfriend? Do you suffer from a loss of trust? This can be disheartening and sometimes irritating. In this scenario, you need to give this bitter experience a little time, and maybe when you understand his real intentions, things fall in place. Some need a lot of patience to deal with this.
Don’t allow your hopes to shatter when you see him flirting with a girl in your presence, stay calm. A cheeky boyfriend doesn’t necessarily mean he is cheating on you. Avoid allowing your insecurities to get the better of you and don’t let anger overcome your thoughts. Handling things maturely prevents you from walking towards out the door on your relationship.
If you no longer feel enthusiastic about the guy you love, your eyes don’t twinkle with happiness and excitement, one won’t blame you. After all, a partner who make advances on other woman is not a pleasant.
However, being flirty doesn’t always mean that your partner feels any physical attraction to others, or has sexual interest towards them. Sometimes it’s just harmless fun.
The suggestions on how to cope with this are based on feedback received from 10,000 Gleeden users (female) from across the nation.
Do not rush!
Different people flirt for different reasons. So, before assuming that he is a cheater and has bad intentions, make sure that you don’t rush and end up taking a harsh decision. The reasons might surprise you, some flirt simply to boost their confidence, some prefer doing it for fun, and few might do this because they have a flirty personality and do it unintentionally without any real interest in the person. Try and see if he flirts only with hot girls, or if he just simply gets on well with anyone he meets and speaks with. Keep calm and observe!
Based on their real life experience, 46.25 per cent of Gleeden users have said that being patient to judge a man’s character is the best way to go forward. Impulsive behaviour could lead to verbal engagements that can hamper the relationship.
Be calm and self-composed
The first thing you should do after discovering his intentions is to stay poised. The naturally flirtatious ones won’t harm you. Make him realise his habit unnerves you and find a middle path. We know it’s tough to remain graceful but that’s the only wise thing to do here. Find the right time, cool your nerves, and have a little casual chat, not too serious!
Self-control is the best way forward and 51.12 per cent of Gleeden users have suggested the same. Irrespective of the steps taken by the male counterpart, the Gleeden community suggests staying calm and being happy in your own world, this will not only send a strong message to your partner but remember you should never allow your happiness to be dependant on another.
Watch your tone
In the heat of the moment, you might miss out and your tone may become harsh as you discuss sensitive matters. If you talk to him in an accusing and offending tone, you will never achieve what you want. By raising your voice, he will simply get defensive and the spark between you two will start vanishing. If you wish to get things done, talk but don’t fall prey to an unnecessary argument. It will lead you nowhere. Maturely communicate with him, ensure that you control your anger, and talk some sense.
Words can’t be taken back and the Gleeden community also strongly believes in it as 41.42 per cent of the users have voted the same. Even in the case of an argument, words should be chosen wisely with a milder tone.
Don’t act naive
Trust is the backbone, but too much trust is also not good. Find the right balance between trust and awareness. You must ensure to be trustworthy but yet conscious of what is really going on in his life. The right attitude towards your love life and partner will ensure a happy and joyful relationship.
About 40.34 per cent of Gleeden users have said that one should always keep both their eyes open in a relationship. One should always be aware of the status of the relationship and how the other person is behaving.
Trust is essential
It is! Things don’t take a U-turn all of a sudden and change dramatically. Do not put too much pressure on him, give him sufficient time to show you his efforts, and try and be positive. Give him the signal you trust him, he will feel happy and will make an effort to make you feel relieved.
Relationships are built on trust and 45.72 per cent Gleeden users agree. Interestingly about 38 per cent of them have stated that the trust should not be blind!
Communication is key
Communicating in the right manner plays a very important role in taking care of your relationship. Do not show the ugly side of your relationship by indulging in unnecessary arguments when in public and instead, find a moment to talk when it’s just the two of you. Create a dialogue and express what you have noticed so far and how it feels to be in your position. The golden rule is, do not accuse him, ask him the reason behind it and make sure you make him comfortable to open up with you. Try to end the conversation on a good note where you don’t end up hurting him and request him to control his behavior for the sake of your relationship.
About 43.7 per cent of Gleeden users state that many relationships end due to lack of communication among the partners whereas 41.7 per cent of them state that there is no harm in taking the first step to start a communication if the feelings are real.